What did the prophet muhammad say about family? What is the prophet muhammed relationship with family?
The institution of the family, which was created by Allah the Almighty as the reason for the continuance of humanity, started with the first human being Adam (A.S.) and reached its perfect state with Muhammad, the Messenger of Allah (pbuh).
Allah the Absolute Ruler has created everything based on a deep and delicate wisdom. Beginning with the natural characteristics of men and women, their ability to complete each other, their feelings and relation to each other, and their ways of satisfying these feelings are all created for a reason. When these features are used in accordance with the object of their creation, human beings will be in harmony with the universe and will not experience spiritual disorder. This world and the afterlife will become a heaven for them. But when they begin to use these features against the Divine commands, their misery will increase as they think that their momentary desires will bring real happiness. They will find themselves in the middle of a crisis in this world.
As a part of the Divine order of the universe, men and women are equipped with feelings, desires and natural tendencies towards each other. (Al- Imran 3; 14) Allah the Almighty has not only given these feelings to human beings but also defined some limits to satisfy them. These limits can be best be described as the marriages performed in accordance with the Sunnah of the Prophet (pbuh). Marriages which are against the principles of Islam are deemed unlawful and prohibited. Such relations are considered fruitless and will end in disappointment. In this matter Allah, the Absolute Ruler, the Creator, is the only One Who has the final say, and He is the One Who is going to question His servants about their deeds. Those who go beyond the Divine limits lose the possibility of taking the right steps.
On the other hand, humans are social beings by nature. They need to live in a society. It is required in order to fulfil their needs and weaknesses. Family is one of the most important ways of doing this. Since men and women are created to need each other, they will not be able to satisfy their nature and attain peace and tranquility without establishing a family. Women are apt in raising the children and are superior in modesty to men. They are also more attached to their family. They are skilful in housework and more obedient, whereas men usually have more experience and are more arduous and braver in protecting their family. This is why men and women need each other and one cannot maintain his/her life fully without the other’s support. This is expressed in the Qur’an as follows:
“…They are your garments and you are their garments…” (al-Baqara 2; 187)
“And We have created you in pairs” (al-Naba’ 78; 8)
Allah’s Messenger (pbuh) wanted his followers to grow in number and thus encouraged them to get married saying:
“Marriage is of my sunnah. Marriage is a sunnah of mine. So, whosoever does not act upon my Sunnah has no relation with me. Get married; for I shall be proud that you have outnumber the other ummahs. Whoever has the means should get married and whoever does not have the means should fast; for fasting is a shield for him …” (Ibn Majah, Nikah, 1)
A man came to the Prophet (pbuh) and said:
“I have found a woman of rank and beauty, but she does not give birth to children. Should I marry her?” The Prophet (pbuh) said:
“No.” The man came again, but the Prophet (pbuh) did not give him permission. He came to him for the third time, and he (the Prophet) said:
“Marry women who are loving and can reproduce, for I shall outnumber the other ummahs by you.” [1] (Abu Dawud, Nikah, 3; Nasai, Nikah, 11)
Allah the Almighty had given a different secret: miracles, blessings, virtues, and protection in marriage. One who puts his life in order through marriage can save himself from illicit things and protect his chastity. Love between a man and a woman gains a different dimension and meaning through marriage. Allah’s Apostle (pbuh) said that:
“There is nothing more effective in strengthening the love between those who love each other than marriage.” (Ibn Majah, Nikah, 1)
Marriage also protects society just as it protects individuals; for a society will also become chaste and virtuous when it is made up of chaste individuals. Allah’s Messenger (pbuh) pointed out this fact as follows:
“If someone whose religiosity and morals are pleasing to you, comes and asks for your daughter’s hand in marriage, let him marry her. Otherwise mischief and disorder will emerge in the world.” (Tirmidhi, Nikah, 3)
In Islam the object and wisdom behind marriage is to achieve peace and tranquility, to maintain the human race and protect it from sins. Sexual pleasure is in a way a partial compensation bestowed by Allah the Almighty for the fulfillment of the true objective. Since Allah the Almighty has created men and women to be attracted to each other, they can attain serenity only by coming together. As the Holy Qur’an puts it:
“And among His Signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): verily in that are signs for those who reflect.” (al-Rum 30; 21)
Jalal al-Din Rumi (q.s.)?? states these facts as follows:
“Since love (of desired things, women, etc. (Al-i Imran 3; 14)) is decked out for men (made attractive to them): how can they escape from women who are created beautifully and adorned by Allah?
Inasmuch as He created her (the woman) that he (man) might take comfort in her, how can Adam be parted from Eve?
Even if he (the husband) be Rustam son of Zál and greater than Hamza (in valor), as regards authority he is his old woman’s (his wife’s) captive.” (Mathnawi, I, verses: 2425-2427)
Home is the most ideal place for teaching Islam. The best education and discipline, too, can be given in the warmth of the home. Fear of Allah, love for Him, and love for His Messenger can be inoculated into young hearts in such homes. Religion, language, culture, and understanding can be transferred to the new generations through such an institution. Nations grow by means of such and are destroyed by its decadence. Because of its significance, believers who love Islam and humanity are concerned with strengthening it, while the enemies of goodness try to destroy its roots.
Islam is a religion revealed in such a way as to be compatible with human nature. In other words, Islam is “human’s life map.” It organizes and explains every aspect of life. It is the essential guidance to achieve Paradise and to see the Face of Allah. Its principles were manifested in the Prophet’s life in the most perfect sense. Therefore, in order to reach eternal salvation one should pay attention to establishing his family in accordance with the principles of Islam as in the practice of the Prophet (pbuh).
[1] What is meant by this prophetic saying is to encourage his followers to have children. Otherwise, he does not prohibit the marrying of infertile or divorced women. Such women are usually in psychological pain and hardship. Taking care of their troubles and appeasing their pains is among the believers’ social responsibilities. This was why all of the marriages of Allah’s Messenger (pbuh) were with divorced women or widows except for Aisha (r. anha).
Source: The History of Prophets in Light of The Qur’an, THE CHAIN OF PROPHETS II, Osman Nuri TOPBAŞ, Erkam Publications
